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Loading ...|A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, “I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine’s day. What do you think it means?”"You’ll know tonight.” he said.That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it–only to find a book entitled “The meaning of dreams”.
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...|A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says, “I’m sending out one thousand Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?’”"But why?” asks the man.”I’m a divorce lawyer,” the man replies.
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...|? Don’t let worry kill you. Let the Church help. ? Thursday night-Potluck Supper. Prayer and medication to follow. ? Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community. ? For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs. ? Thursday at 5PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become Little Mothers, please see the minister in his private study.? This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar. ? Next Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and get a piece of paper. ? A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow. ? At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What is Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice. ? The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement Friday. ? Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. ? The 1991 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11. ? Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary. ? 8 new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. ? The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir. ? Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan who are preparing for the girth of their first child. and last but not least…? Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...|A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.The Pastor said to him, “You need to join the Army of the Lord!” My friend replied, “I’m already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor.” Pastor questioned, “How come I don’t see you except at Christmas and Easter?” He whispered back, “I’m in the secret service.